I am in no way affiliated with or an owner or creator of Movie Fights or Screen Junkies. I’m just a huge fan, and this is meant only as a fun way for me (Sarah) to flex my argument muscles. No copyright infringement or offense or hard feelings are intended.

If you don’t know what Movie Fights is, it’s a youttube show created by Screen Junkies where nerds get to fight about stuff that really matters, namely comic books, movies, and pop culture. Since I, obviously, will never be invited to be on the show, I thought it would be fun to watch their latest movie fight and put my two cents in about what I would argue. Below is a link to the video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luWszLI09R0

Just to be fair, I’m not going to take down the other fighter’s answers, since they can’t respond to me here. I’m just going to present the argument for my choice.

Again, I am not affiliated with Screen Junkies or Movie Fights in anyway.

First Fight: Which Actor Has Had the Best Performance in a Bad Movie?

My answer: Hugh Jackman in X-Men: The Last Stand

First of all, you can’t argue that X-Men: The Last Stand isn’t a bad movie. Just saying the title aloud makes all X-Men fans, and all movie fans, groan. It was so bad that they had to make an entire movie just to undo all the damage that X-Men: The Last Stand did to the franchise.

That being said, Hugh Jackman is still really good in it. He gives Wolverine his usual bravado and charm, but he also really makes the emotional scenes impactful. The movie as a whole doesn’t work, but Hugh Jackman really stands above the rest and rises above the bad material with another solid performance. He could sleepwalk through the movie by that point, but he didn’t. All of the other actors seems bored or lost or just phoning it in, but his performance is on a different level. He brought his A game. He is the best part of an otherwise atrocious movie.

Second Fight: Which Stallone Movie Would Work Better With Arnold?

My Answer: Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over

Stallone is so his own person it’s hard to recast him. To make it work for this fight, it has to work BETTER than casting Stallone. I would argue that most of his roles are iconic because of what he brings to them. Even if he’s not an amazing actor, he does what he does very well. Therefore, I looked for a movie where he was absolutely NOT doing what he does best (i.e. being tough and punching people). Comedy is not in his wheelhouse. Children’s movies are not in his wheelhouse. He doesn’t understand them, just like he doesn’t understand comedy. Arnold has more experience doing both comedy and children’s movies (Kindergarten Cop, Twins, Junior, Jingle All the Way), therefore I chose SpyKids 3-D: Game Over to replace Stallone.

Think about it. Arnold would have brought the same level of action stardom to the role. Kids know Arnold probably even better than Stallone, so it would have been just as fun if not more fun for them to see him do this part. Plus, watching Arnold play a villain in a children’s movie would be hilarious. The movie would not miss a beat, and Arnold would bring another layer of goofiness and weird charm to the role than Stallone did.

Fight 3: What Superhero Would You Want To Be For An Entire Year?

My Pick: Superman

This is SO OBVIOUS I can’t even believe no one picked him. OF COURSE I want to BE Superman. He’s basically immortal. He can fly, he’s indestructible, he’s as close to being a god as you can ever get. He isn’t emotionally damaged like Batman. He isn’t a raging alcoholic. He doesn’t have the issues that other heroes have. He’s a good person, he’s a good guy. As long as you go into every situation with Lex just ASSUMING he has kryptonite and make a contingency plan, I’ll be golden. I can literally do and accomplish anything I want.

Fight 4: If You Could Punch One Actor In The Face, Who Would It Be?

My Answer: Tom Hanks

I don’t want to punch anyone in the face ever, so I’m picking someone who’s so nice I can punch him and then immediately apologize, and he’ll not only forgive me I could probably ask him for a hug and he’ll say “okay”. It’s well documented that he’s the nicest guy in show business. He’s amazingly sweet and giving, and he’d forgive me for hurting someone. Anyone else would hold a grudge, and how could I live with myself for that?

Fight 5: Which Movie Character Deserves Its Own Lego Set and Lego Movie?

My Answer: Princess Bride.

Another no-brainer. Princess Bride has amazing sets: The Pit of Despair, the castle, the boat, the Cliffs of Insanity… lots of possibilities for fun and building and recreating your own adventures. There are lots of swords and other weapons and props you could use. You also have pirate, knights, “the man in black”, Andre the Giant, the six-fingered man, the list goes on and on. Every character is iconic and would be instantly recognizable as a Lego piece. The movie also has a lot of humor all ready, so translating it to a movie would be perfectly in line with the canon film without changing much.

Fight 6: Pitch a Blockbuster as a Low-Budget Indie

My Answer: The Dark Knight Rises

Everyone loved The Dark Knight. Everyone loved Batman Begins. What went wrong with The Dark Knight Rises? The answer is that the passion for the characters was gone. The passion for a cohesive story was gone. If Chris Nolan had been forced to focus more on the things that made the first two movies so good, we could have avoided the bloated mess that was The Dark Knight Rises. We know that Christopher Nolan is an incredibly creative director. He’s made movies with low budgets before, and he’s made them look amazing. If instead of just trying to duplicate his box office success he had been forced to get creative again and make things work with very little money, this movie would have been more interesting and more fun for everyone.

These are my answers! I didn’t let myself use the answers any of the fighters used, since that’s the rules. What are your answers? Let me know!