Why Trump’s Words Matter to Women, and Why They Should Matter to Men

 

First of all, I am going to quote the leaked tape from 2005 directly, and I am not going to censor it. If you’re offended by reading exactly what the potential President of the United States said, don’t read on. This article is not for you. But I believe it’s important to see it in black and white, so that the full horror is visible and unadulterated. I do not believe in saying “he who shall not be named”. I believe in naming evil and claiming back the good.

The words spoken by Donald Trump on that tape from Access Hollywood in 2005 are more than vile. They are more than disgusting. They are advocating for rape culture and sexual assault, and they should be not only offensive to men and women alike, they should solidify in any voter’s mind how unqualified for the role of President Donald Trump really is.

When Donald Trump said “You know I’m automatically attracted to beautiful – I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. Don’t even wait”, this was not just “locker room banter”, as so many of his defenders claim. Yes, I accept that guys talk about women behind closed doors. At least, a certain class of man does. But even if that’s true, that doesn’t make it right, and it doesn’t excuse it. The fact that many men (I will not say all, so put away your “not all men” hashtags) in this county are desensitized to the point they think this kind of speech is “normal” is part of the problem. A big part of the problem. Women are not sex objects. Women do not exist to be oogled. Women do not exist to fulfill your fantasies and to be leered at by you. Normalizing does not make it right, it makes it worse.

In the same video, he openly speaks about trying to sleep with a married woman. “She wanted to get some furniture. I said, I’ll show you where they have some nice furniture… I moved on her like a bitch, but I couldn’t get there.” This single line shows that Donald Trump sees women as prostitutes, money-eating machines who owe a man sex for goods and services rendered. Married, not married, it doesn’t matter. Women are expected to offer up sex at the drop of a hat, just as long as they are properly compensated for it. Does that not make you mad, men of America? It should. What if that was your wife? What if that was your mother, or sister, or aunt, or cousin?

What if he was talking about you?

What if he was hitting on a man relentlessly, expecting a man to give up sex for furniture?

I’ve heard this be defended by men saying, “A woman could talk like that about me, and I wouldn’t mind.”

That’s because you’re coming from a place of power still. You’re coming from a place of power. What if you were powerless? What if you were told “I’ll buy you furniture, you’ll give me sex, or I’ll ruin your career.” What if you were told, “I’ll compel you to have sex with me, and when you report it as a rape, the police will ask you what you were wearing and why you were alone with him in the first place.” I’m not saying that’s what Trump said directly or indirectly, what I am saying is that is the attitude of the majority of men in power in this country.

Step away from your privilege for a moment, I know it’s hard, and imagine being a woman in this situation.

Step away and imagine a woman you love being this powerless.

Then, look me in the eyes and tell me it’s locker room talk.

Look me in the eyes and tell me a man has the right to talk about me like this

Look me in the eyes and tell me that it’s okay for a Presidential candidate to believe he can grab me by my “pussy” without consent.

Look me in my eyes and tell me I’m being too sensitive.